


The Potato Incident

by the_genderman



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bad Cooking, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Not quite crackfic, inspired by a true story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-10-24
Packaged: 2019-01-22 03:45:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12472740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_genderman/pseuds/the_genderman
Summary: The kitchen smoke detector jolted Sam rudely awake. He groaned, feeling like he had just barely gotten back to sleep. He instinctively turned to check on Bucky, even though he knew he was a light enough sleeper that he was probably already wide awake.





	The Potato Incident

Sam woke to an annoying beeping, dragging him out of a rather nice dream. He reached over and fumbled for his alarm clock’s reset button. It was Saturday, wasn’t it? He was allowed to sleep in on Saturday if he so chose. He drifted back to sleep.

The kitchen smoke detector jolted Sam rudely awake. He groaned, feeling like he had just barely gotten back to sleep. He instinctively turned to check on Bucky, even though he knew he was a light enough sleeper that he was probably already wide awake. 

No Bucky. Was he making breakfast? That could explain the smoke detector. Sam climbed out of bed and hurried to the kitchen.

Sam reached the kitchen door and stopped short. The lights were all off, but he could see Bucky clearly enough by the fact that the microwave was currently on fire. Bucky fumbled with the fire extinguisher, finally getting it working, and turned it on the now ex-microwave, smothering the fire and leaving a foamy mess on the counter. Sam flicked the lights on. The wall-clock read 2:49 am.

Bucky whirled around to face the doorway and Sam. “Oh. Heeeyyyyy,” he said, only sounding a _little_ guilty.

“Bucky. It is the middle of the damn night. What are you doing?” Sam asked grumpily. By all rights he should still be asleep. But no.

“I wanted a midnight snack,” Bucky explained.

“The microwave was _on fire_. What were you trying to make?” Sam asked.

“I _wanted_ a baked potato,” Bucky said peevishly, reaching into the charred, foamy, former microwave with his metal hand and pulling out a blackened potato.

“You’re not supposed to put foil in the microwave, remember?” Sam sighed.

“I _know_ that,” Bucky said, shaking the potato at Sam. “No foil.”

“Then what the hell did you do to our microwave?”

“I dunno,” Bucky shrugged. “I poked holes in the potato, put it in, hit the potato button, but it wasn’t done yet, so I put it back in and hit the potato button again. I went to the fridge to get the butter and when I looked back, the potato was on fire. I popped the microwave door open and then _everything_ was on fire.”

“What?” Sam said, shaking his head as if the motion would clarify Bucky’s statement. “The potato just caught fire? Spontaneously?”

“Well, I _assume_ so. I wasn’t looking at it when it ignited.”

“Again. _What_?”

“Look, I’m as confused as you are. Maybe it was just the microwave’s time to go.”

Sam just stared. He was nowhere near rested enough for this.

“I’m being serious! I really do not know why it caught fire,” Bucky explained again, gesturing with the potato.

“You know what? I don’t care anymore. I’m going back to bed. We can deal with that,” Sam waved his hand in the general direction of the ex-microwave, “in the morning. When it’s light out. Whatever. Enjoy your potato.”

Sam turned and left the kitchen. He climbed back into bed and fell right asleep.

\---------------

It actually was light out when Sam woke again. Bucky’s arm was loosely curled around him. He felt Bucky’s breath on his neck. He turned his head to say ‘good morning’ and recoiled when Bucky’s morning breath hit his face. It was considerably worse than usual.

“Ugh, God!” Sam exclaimed, pushing Bucky off of him. “What did you _do_? Your breath smells like you actually ate that nasty potato.”

Bucky laughed sleepily. “What? I don’t waste food.”

**Author's Note:**

> Names have been changed to protect the persons involved, but this story is loosely based off of an _actual_ potato-fire incident.


End file.
